Monday, December 13, 2010

Male Anatomy


KATRINA: I wish the guying checking me out across the library knew I was reading about the prostate right now. I think he'd stop trying to catch my eye.

STEPHEN: Maybe you should throw a prostate in his eye.

KATRINA: I'm not sure how to do that. Sounds messy.

STEPHEN: Sometimes in life you don't know you can do something until you actually try. Go for it!

KATRINA: Where do I get a prostate???

STEPHEN: Craigslist.

DAYS PASS...

KATRINA: Did you know the testes were the main sex organ? They are more important than the penis. Also. The name of the muscle that descends the testes is called the gubernaculum.

STEPHEN: Good. That reminds me. Did you throw that prostate in that guy's eye?

KATRINA: Craigslist was sold out.


DEAR CRAIGSLIST: GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER.

Thursday, December 2, 2010

Are you mad?!

Once upon a time we completed a mad lib on a subway ride. It went something like this:



DRIVING IN THE CAR
 
Last summer for a vacation, my dad drove us to (the) hell
A PLACE
. Our car is a/an 3.5 BC
YEAR
sedan with 13
NUMBER
doors and a/an hairy and ballsac like
ADJECTIVE
motor. We started out at sunrise. My mom and dad spent all night laughing
VERB ENDING IN 'ING'
the house and frolicking
VERB ENDING IN 'ING'
the car so we could get an early start. My dad took his golf camels
PLURAL NOUN
and my mom took her tennis lesbian librarian
NOUN
. I took my dog, Jesus
PERSON IN ROOM
. The dog and I and my little wet
ADJECTIVE
sister sat in the back. My dad was the driver, and as he came out of the driveway he ran into a/an apple
NOUN
and dented a/an sexy rainboots
NOUN
. My mom said, “Why don’t you pay attention and watch where you are giddy upping
VERB ENDING IN 'ING'
?” After 364
NUMBER
hours, we stopped to paint
VERB
at a minestrone
NOUN
. The minestrone
SAME NOUN
was horrible, and this got my dad skipping
VERB ENDING IN 'ING'
again. After driving loopily
ADVERB
in this manner for two days, we finally arrived here and have been having a really drunkenly
ADJECTIVE
time.